


Idiosyncrasies

by clockscountingbackwards



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-17
Updated: 2018-11-01
Packaged: 2019-08-03 15:36:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 22,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16328756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clockscountingbackwards/pseuds/clockscountingbackwards
Summary: Away on an away mission Chakotay and Seven decide to fake date to capture the Captain’s attention. They, however, get more than they bargained for and not so unexpected emotions crop up. Takes place after Human Error.





	1. Chapter 1

Seven stood at her work station, plotting a course through a nebula when Commander Chakotay walked in.

           “How’s the course coming for our away mission?” he asked.

           “It will be finished shortly. There are some subspace eddies that we will have to watch out for,” she explained.

           “I’m sure we’ll make it through with your superb navigational skills.” He smiled and left Seven to her work.

           She sighed and punch in some new course corrections to avoid the eddies. Chakotay gave her body an odd physiological response. She felt tingly. It wasn’t an unpleasant feeling but Seven would rather it didn’t happen. It would be distracting. She had her efficiency to think of after all. She couldn’t let strange tingly feelings affect her work. She worked on clearing her head as she continued her work.

XxXxX

Chakotay left the Astrometric’s Lab. He was looking forward to this away mission. He had become friends with Seven and the busy life of a star ship didn’t allow for much time for socializing. This away mission was just them and he would be able to get some more personal time with her. He told himself that’s all it was. He was just wanting to spend some time alone with his friend. He had candle light dinners with the Captain that only amounted to friendship how could an away mission allow for more if a candle light dinner didn’t. He didn’t like that after all these candle light dinners he had with the Captain only amounted in friendship, rather that she would go no further. He had had hoped when they were trapped on that planet together so long ago. He had hoped that she would allow herself to feel the love for him that he knew was already there. Once they were back on the ship though she put up her old barrier and friends is what they settled back into. He understood. She was the captain and she shouldn’t be fraternizing with her crew but this wasn’t just any Star Fleet mission. They could be out here for years even decades. If they were back in the Alpha quadrant, and he wasn’t Maqui, she would have been able to pursue him once she was no longer his captain. They wouldn’t have had to keep their relationship the way it was. He was glad they were in the Delta Quadrant, though. He wouldn’t have had the relationship with her that he had. He was thankful for it. He wanted to protect it even if he wanted more.

           He walked into her ready room.

           “You wanted to see me, Captain?”

           “I was wondering how the preparations for your away mission with Seven was going?” She smiled at him. It was an excuse to see him and she knew it. She was slightly jealous that he was going to have alone time with Seven. They were a compatible pair, she thought. She had seen them work closely together and saw the chemistry between them. She so wished that she could join them. She loved Chakotay, she had for a while now. And Seven, well Seven was endearing, and never boring. As she had watched Seven grow into the individual she was today, Kathryn couldn’t help but fall for Seven. She was inspiring. In the moments like this she regretted that she was captain and unable to pursue the relationships that she wanted to have. She would take either them any day but a captain had to keep her distance.

           “I just came from Astrometric’s and Seven is almost done plotting the course through the nebula. Once I leave here I will start getting the Delta Flyer ready. We’ll be ready by twenty hundred hours in order to leave in the morning at oh-six hundred.”

           “It sounds like everything is order.” Kathryn leaned back and sighed. “I wish I was going with you. This is going to be an interesting survey mission. I wish I could see it first-hand.” She made the hasty excuse. She wanted to go in order to spend time with the two of them.

           “I wish you were coming with us as well. Seven is well Seven and we could use a little bit of your humor to keep the mood light.” Chakotay wanted to command her to come with them. He wanted her there more than he realized. She would balance out Seven and also, she would be close to him. Any moment he could get with her was a treasure.

           “I’m sure you two will get along famously. You’ve never had a problem before; I doubt you will have one now.” They got along a little too famously for Kathryn’s sake.

           “That doesn’t mean you aren’t wanted.” Chakotay smiled and Kathryn nearly melted. She would always be a sucker for his smile. If he tried he could charm her to do whatever he wanted. Thankfully he wasn’t that type of person.

           “Go, finish getting ready. I want the most detailed analysis of that nebula and any samples you feel like bringing back. No exceptions.” Kathryn pointed at Chakotay and smirked.

           “Aye, Aye Captain.” Chakotay left before he could make an ass of himself. He had teetered on the edge of saying something more to the Captain about how much she was wanted by him but she has expressed long ago that she wanted no mention of that again. She was rather ridged in her own personal rules and for good reason. It helped keep her sane.

           Kathryn paced in her ready room. She couldn’t keep imagining herself with Chakotay. She couldn’t allow herself to imagine. It was too dangerous. Once she bullied her mind into submission again she would be fine for a while and resistant to his charms. It was just every once and a while that smile got her and she was sent down on a spiral again, imagining what it would have been like if they never left that planet.

XxXxX

Seven opened her eyes as her regeneration cycle completed. She found she was anxious about this away mission. She wasn’t worried about analyzing the nebula, no, she could do that while regenerating, she was worried about being in such close quarters for that week alone with Chakotay. Since she terminated her use of her holodeck program she had been avoiding Chakotay to the best of her ability. She didn’t want to forget the difference between reality and fantasy. This upcoming week had the potential to be difficult for her. She stepped out of her alcove and grabbed the bag that she packed last night for the away mission. It was filled with supplies they might need and some pads with interesting things she might read. She was hoping to avoid interacting with Chakotay as much as possible. It wouldn’t be ideal but it would be better than toeing the line between fantasy and reality.

XxXxX

Chakotay struggled with putting on his uniform before realizing he was putting on his undershirt backwards. He was going to spend a week with Seven alone. He was excited for it. He hoped the time would bring them closer. He was anticipating a week full of revelation. Once he was able to properly dress himself he sat down on his bed and let his mind wander. It went first to Seven. He was curious to see her in an imperfect state. She was always impeccable. He was curious if she woke up like that. If she even let her hair down so to speak, literally too. He wanted to know those tiny little details that truly made Seven, Seven. Chakotay rose from his bed. He would probably figure out a few of them on this away mission. He better get going or else he was going to be late and Seven wouldn’t tolerate that.

XxXxX

They met in the shuttle bay. Seven who was about to get into the Flyer as the Commander entered nodded to him before climbing aboard. She settled in her things before placing herself at ops. Chakotay joined her a moment later and settled himself at the helm.

           “Are you ready Seven?” Chakotay asked.

           “I am adequately prepared if that is what you mean,” Seven responded with her signature eye roll.

           Chakotay smiled and started preparing the Flyer for launch. Once Voyager came him the all clear he started up the thrusters and maneuvered out of the shuttle bay.

           “Did you sleep well?” He asked as he kicked the Flyer into warp.

           “My regeneration unit is functioning properly,” she replied.

           “That’s not what I asked,” he said as he turned to her. She gave him a look before continuing in her task. He turned back to the helm. “You know it is going to be a very boring week if we don’t talk to each other during it.”

           “Boring for you perhaps.”

           Chakotay couldn’t help but smile.

XxXxX

           “Doctor, you wanted to see me?” Kathryn strode into Sick Bay.

           “Yes, I may have found a way a small regeneration unit for Seven that wouldn’t need to be recharged every night,” he explained.

           “Have you talked about this with Seven?”

           “No, I wanted it to be a surprise for when she got back for her away mission with Commander Chakotay.”

           “I think that is a great idea. What can I do to help?” Kathryn leaned on the medical console.

           “First I think it would make the surprise complete if it came with her own quarters. With this new regeneration technique she wouldn’t have to stay in cargo bay two.”

           “I’ll get it arranged, and secondly?”

           “I’ll need some help with constructing the device.”

           “Why not ask B’Elanna?”

           “I tried,” The Doctor looked frazzled, “but she said some inappropriate Klingon words and told me she was busy this week.”

           Kathryn smiled. “I’ll give you a hand Doctor.”

           “I appreciate it, Captain.”

XxXxX

It had been four hours since they last talked. Seven tried not to notice, she tried to be calmed by the silence as she usually was but she couldn’t help but keep an eye on the time and watching how long they went without talking.

           Chakotay hated the silence. This was not the week he had been expecting. He wanted to say something but he didn’t know what. He just wanted to break the silence somehow. He could sense that maybe there was something more going on in this silence than he was aware.

           He heard Seven sigh.

           “Something bothering you?” he asked.

           “I find I no longer require silence,” she responded.

           “Is that so?” Chakotay turned to look at her.

           “Yes, and I was wondering what your favorite color is?”

           “Green, and yours?” he asked, turning back to the helm.

           “I find I am found of yellow.”

           “Small talk is not normally like you, Seven,” Chakotay commented. He was intrigued that she was the one to break the silence and that she would do it will small talk of all things. A thing she had expressed earlier that she didn’t really like or understand.

           “When getting to know someone better, small talk, as the Doctor tells me, is essential.”

           “So, you just want to get to know me better?”

           “I feel like it would be a good use of my time to get to know a colleague, a person who I work with closely better so that I might work better with them in the future,” she explained.

           “So, this is all in the name of efficiency then?”

           “What else would it be?” she asked.

           “One could hope that it would be because you either already consider this person your friend or you want to consider this person your friend.”

           “That is a factor in this small talk. I do consider you a friend.”  _I would like to consider you more than just that._  She said to herself. She knew she would have to start somewhere.

           “I consider you a friend as well and it would be my honor to get to know you better.” He smiled to himself. Maybe this trip would work out well for him after all.


	2. Chapter 2

Kathryn woke up the next morning smiling, knowing that she was doing something to surprise Seven. She was glad she was doing something that would make life for Seven easier. She cared about Seven a lot more than Seven realized. She always would and she always hoped she could find a way to make it better for Seven. After all she was the reason Seven was here at all. She felt responsible and she wanted to make a good life for Seven. She had hoped at one point that she could make Seven’s life better by being with her. It was a hope shortly lived. Even though Seven wasn’t Star Fleet, she was still a member of the crew and the hierarchy had to remain intact. Kathryn felt that if she gave herself to someone she wouldn’t be able to continue commanding them afterwards. She didn’t know if she could separate her romantic relationship with someone with her working relationship with someone. And she couldn’t compromise her command over this ship.

           With that happy thought she got out of bed. She was still happy that she could do those little things. The candle light dinners with Chakotay. Helping Seven with her progress as an individual. She still wished she could do more with them. Maybe, only maybe if they had no other choice but to stay in the Delta Quadrant she would be able to let her guard down and make something more of either of these to relationships. Or maybe even both. She smiled to herself and headed to Sick Bay to help the Doctor.

XxXxX

Chakotay was dying to ask if Seven had any romantic interests. He guessed that at this point in her individuality she would probably have one or two or at least she was curious about it. He was still hoping to find out what made her tick. In the far reaches of his mind he wanted to see if he was one of the things, the people that made her tick. It had only been a day of getting to know you in the Flyer and he wasn’t sure if it was the right time or not. He knew though that soon he wouldn’t care if it was the right time or not. He would ask her anyways. He could be an incredibly patient man but for some reason with her he didn’t want to be. He knew he would have to be though.

           A day later he gave in and asked her.

           “So, Seven, may I ask you a personal question?” he started gently. He didn’t want her to get startled and shut down like she has in the past.

           “Isn’t that the point of getting to know one another, personal questions?”

           She was right of course. “Call it a human politeness, often when one is apprehensive about asking a question.”

           “Why are you apprehensive?”

           “For most this is a question that not everyone likes to be asked.”

           “What is this question?”

           “Do you have any romantic interests.”

           Seven was slightly taken aback. She didn’t know what she was expecting but it wasn’t this. “Captain Janeway,” she replied. She didn’t realize how true that was until she said it and she wasn’t about to admit to Chakotay that he was one of her interests.

           Chakotay’s heart sank a little at hearing this. He didn’t expect to be an interest for her but he had hoped that he was.

           “Do you have any romantic interests?” Seven knew even if she was one of his interests he wasn’t likely to say so now.

           “Oddly enough, Captain Janeway as well.”

           “I doubt she will enter into a relationship with either of us. She is the Captain after all and must retain a respectable distance from her subordinates.”

           “I may have a way to change that.” He might get his wish after all.

           “And what would that be?”

XxXxX

Kathryn walked into the quarters that she had assigned for Seven. The Doctor was there waiting for her.

           “Do you think we should do some decorating for her?” Kathryn asked and she strode around the room.

           “Something tells me that Seven will want to do that herself. I’m sure she will have impeccable taste.” The Doctor was remembering Seven’s holodeck program. He had greatly admired her taste in décor.

           “What else do we need for the device?” Kathryn asked sitting down on the couch that was soon to be Seven’s. She hoped that she would be here often.

           “A few more things but they can wait until tomorrow. After all, Seven won’t get back for another five days.”

           “Of course, Doctor. Let me know when you need me again.” She got up from the couch and walked to the door. She paused and turned back. “Seven is going to love this.” She turned back around and exited.

           “That she is.” The Doctor said to himself. He still held a little bit of a flame for Seven but he knew his chances with her were long since passed. He saw the Captain’s eagerness to help Seven. He saw the way Seven looked at the Commander. He hoped one of these would work out for her. She deserved all the happiness in the world. And by giving her this gift, the Doctor hoped he would be able to contribute to that happiness. A place to call home is always a source of peace. He walked out of her quarters and headed back to Sick Bay, anxious for Seven’s return.

XxXxX

Seven was incredulous. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

           “You want us to fake date in order to capture the attention of the Captain. How is that going to assist us? The Captain is not a jealous woman and it wouldn’t change her views on fraternizing with her subordinates.”

           “I have a feeling that it will make her want us more when it seems she can no longer have us. Jealousy has nothing to do with it. It is all about wanting what she cannot have.”

           “I have never understood the desire for people to want what they cannot have. It always seemed pointless to me.”

           “It can be,” Chakotay admitted.

           “And you think the Captain is susceptible to this?”

           “Most people are.”

           “The Captain isn’t most people.” Seven was slightly disgruntled. She did not think this plan would work in the slightest.

           “No, she is not. I still think it is worth a shot. What have we got to lose?”

           Seven wanted to say everything. She didn’t want to fake date Chakotay she wanted to actually date him. She liked the Captain yes but she also wanted Chakotay.

           He wanted her to say yes to his plan and it wasn’t just to capture the Captain’s attention. He wanted to be near her. He wanted to spend more time with her. This plan would give him the opportunity to do so and hopefully it would spark something within her. Maybe as they went along they wouldn’t be fake dating anymore.

           Seven cursed the rules of monogamy that most societies had in place for if she could she would have both of them, not one or the other both. Maybe this plan would allow her that at least in a small way. It would give her time with Chakotay and if she did capture the eye of the Captain then maybe something there would develop as well. She used her limited knowledge of human behavior to calculate her chances and no matter how much she disagreed with this plan, it seemed to be the only way that she would at least partially get what she wanted.

           “Fine.”

           “Fine?” he questioned as he looked at her.

           “We will go with your plan.”

           He turned from her so that she couldn’t see his face turn into a huge grin. He was ecstatic that she said yes. He didn’t think he was going to receive an answer so quickly. Maybe there was more going on in her head that he realized. She had a calm façade but maybe it was only a façade. He again wanted to know more but he just wasn’t sure how to get underneath her exterior. He hoped that maybe, just maybe this fake dating would help him figure her out a little more and they still had a while left on this trip. He would make sure to make the most of it.

           “We’ll need a story,” he told her.

           “A story for what?” she asked perturbed.

           “How our relationship started. If we are going to do this we might as well do this well.”

           “I agree.”

           “I thought you might,” he laughed. She glared at his back from over her console.

XxXxX

Kathryn was anxious for their return. She fiddled with her computer in her ready room not really paying attention to what she was doing. Seven’s surprise was almost done and she wanted it to be played out. She wanted to see what Seven thought of it but mainly she just wanted to see Seven. She missed the former borg. She has been this long without Seven before and hadn’t been affected but she guessed it was the fact that Seven was with Chakotay made it worse. She missed the commander too. Having both of them gone was too much for her. She knew she only had three more days, that most of her time away from them had passed, but these three days would be horrible. She pushed her chair back from her desk. She as the captain, she had to keep her chin up and not show her desire for Seven and Chakotay’s return.

           Her door chimed.

           “Come in,” she called to the person on the other side.

           It was Tuvok. “Good morning Captain.”

           “Good morning Tuvok, what can I do for you today?”

           “I have that security report you asked for.” He held out a pad for her to take.

           “Thank you,” she grabbed the device, “I appreciate this.” She sat back in her chair and started skimming the report.

           Tuvok just stood there.

           She set the pad down on her desk. “Can I help you with anything else?” She assessed his posture to see if see could guess his reasoning. She couldn’t of course but she always liked to try.

           “I was wondering how you are doing.”

           An odd statement coming from a Vulcan. They weren’t much for small talk.

           “What is your concern, Tuvok?” she asked. There was always something more with him.

           “You have been seemingly out of sorts these past few days,” he commented without further explanation.

           “Has any of the crew noticed?” It was a fear of hers that the crew should notice she was being a lovesick puppy.

           “You don’t deny it then.” Tuvok was nothing if not persistent.

           “No, I don’t.” She knew she wouldn’t be able to lie to him.

           “May I ask what is going on?”

           “Has the crew noticed?” she asked again. She needed to know that answer before anything else.

           “No, but as I am your oldest friend I know you better than the crew.”

           “Then what is the problem?” There had to be problem for him to bring this up.

           “It might not currently be one. But as a friend I am concerned it will become one. So I ask again, what is going on?” His voice softened and that note of superiority that normally grace his voice vanished.

           “Just the absence of two of my friends. Nothing to be concerned about,” she said quietly. She didn’t want to admit even to herself that there might be more going on that just that.

           “The only concern I have now is that you consider them more than friends.” He left without being dismissed.

           “How astute my old friend,” she said to herself. “I worry that too.” She got up from her desk and moved to her couch. She sat down, grabbed herself a cup of coffee and sipped it as she stared out her window wondering what Seven and Chakotay were up to now.


	3. Chapter 3

 “I clearly would have asked you out first,” Seven argued.

           “No one is going to believe that,” Chakotay commented.

           “And why not?” she shot back.

           “Your social skills aren’t really compatible with initiating romantic relationships. You avoid every social gathering that we have on board. You missed Tom and B’Elanna’s baby shower for god’s sake.” He punctuated his response with course corrections.

           “I can socialize just fine. I just choose not to,” she responded loftily.

           Chakotay sighed, “Why don’t we make a compromise.”

           “Proceed.”

           “You had asked for me so that you could initiate the relationship but I seized the opportunity and asked you out.”

           “Deal.”

            Chakotay smiled. They weren’t even really dating and already they had their first argument.

           “What first date did you take me on?” she asked.

           “Dinner in my quarters, chicken, broccoli, and rice. Did we kiss?”

           The thought of kissing the real commander Chakotay thrilled her but she kept it to herself.

           “You wanted to but were too nervous to actually do it.” She couldn’t let him have all the control. “Why haven’t we said anything until now?”

           “Gossip travels fast and we wanted to make sure it stuck. Also, you never saw that reasoning enough but didn’t want to create tension so you let it go.”

           “Have we had more than one date?”

           “Not yet. This is kind of half of one and we have one scheduled for when we get back.”

           “A picnic,” she told him.

           “What?”

           “A picnic is our next date. I asked you this time.”

           “Of course.” Chakotay wouldn’t have it any other way.

XxXxX

For the few days they had left they talked over the little details they would need to know to look like they were actually dating. Seven couldn’t believe that this was happening. She had wanted to date Chakotay for a while now and by some accounts now she was. It wasn’t the way she wanted it though. This farce was only a mask and she wanted so much more. She would do it however because within these past few days she had learned more about the commander than she had ever hoped to. She would be close to him and right now it didn’t matter what the reason for that was. She just hoped it would last a while and she hoped that along the way she would get even closer to the commander. She wanted him too much to say no to this farce because in a way she would get him. She knew though, in the far reaches of her logical mind that this would not end well and would probably ruin her chances with him forever. She didn’t care. Her reasoning was that this might be the only time she comes even close to getting what she wants and she was going to take the chance with it. She looked at the back of Chakotay over her console and a rush of emotion ran through her.

           She knew the story they told would raise eyebrows. She didn’t think people on this ship knew she was capable of romantic attraction and the presence of mind to actually act on it. There would be a lot of questions and she needed to be prepared for that. She hoped that her conversations with Chakotay had prepared for most of that. She knew it wouldn’t cover everything but it had to be enough. They only had so much time. At least the continuation of it shouldn’t be that hard. They would have to fake their dates in order keep up appearances and so basically go on those dates to begin with. Eventually they would probably fake a break up in order to get out of it. All would be well.

           Chakotay knew all wouldn’t be well when this was over. He didn’t know what came over him when he suggested that they should fake date. He knew enough about human life to know that this would not end well. Yet he persisted anyways. He knew it was partially because he wanted to be close to Seven. His heart ached for her. He knew that was cliché but he didn’t know how else to describe it. When he looked at her it was like he could barely contain himself in his skin. His chest pounded and he lost his breath time and time again. He did want Kathryn or else he wouldn’t have suggested this but right now he was cursing how stupid he had become. Things would never be the same now with Seven, when this ended badly they would probably barely even been friends. He didn’t know if he could stand that. He hoped that maybe, just maybe, this would all work out. He doubted it but he hoped so badly that this would work out.

He had been slowly falling for Seven before but now he was falling fast and hard. He had gotten more than he bargained for out of this close contact with Seven than he had anticipated and to think this almost turned out to be a boring week. If Seven hadn’t broken the silence he was sure this wouldn’t have happened at all. He wasn’t sure if he was grateful or not. This masquerade would allow him to be close to Seven for a while. It might be worth it just for that. It would have to be or else he wouldn’t be able to live with the after effects. It was a small ship and he knew he would still be working closely with Seven afterwards and he had to deal with the consequences he now created. There would be no other choice. He just hoped that before all of this was over he would have the chance to kiss her at least once.

He was basking in that thought when warning alarms started blaring in his ears. He shook himself out of his reverie.

“What’s going on?” he asked Seven.

“We’ve hit a subspace eddy,” she said as she quickly read her sensor readings. “It’s damaged our port nacelle.”

“I thought you had accounted for all the eddies.” Chakotay maneuvered them away.

“I thought I had. This wasn’t there before.” Seven was frazzled. “There are two more forming in front of us.”

“We need to get out of here. Send all the locations of the eddies to the helm and we’ll see if we can get out of here without any more damage.”

“Understood.” Seven hurriedly tapped her fingers on her console and sent the data needed to Commander Chakotay. She took a breath. They would get through this, Chakotay was an excellent and experienced. pilot.

“Taking us out of here.” He maneuvered the ship upward, the shortest direction out of the nebula.

“Commander! There is an eddy forming right in front of us.”

He wasn’t able to move them away in time and they hit the eddy full on. Something exploded behind the helm and sent Chakotay backwards on to the floor. He hit the floor unconscious.

“Computer transfer the helm controls to ops,” Seven ordered. She looked worryingly at Chakotay but she had to get them out of here before she could do anything. Another direct hit from an eddy could leave them drifting in space. They already couldn’t make more than warp two. She kept a close eye on the sensors and she steered them out of the nebula. She breathed a sigh of relief once they returned to normal space. She sent a distress signal to Voyager and sank to the floor to help the commander.

She first checked for a pulse and finding one she grabbed a tricorder to see if there was anything she could do for him. The burns on his face and hands she could treat simply with a med kit but there were internal issues that the doctor would have to deal with when they got back.

Once she treated his burns she pulled him up into her lap and held him.

“I cannot lose you. It would bring me too much pain,” she whispered to him. His eyes fluttered as if he heard her.

XxXxX

When Kathryn heard that they had received a distress call from the Flyer she was distraught. She couldn’t bare it if anything had happened to them.

           “Take us to them Tom maximum warp,” she commanded. “Bridge to Sick Bay.”

           “Sick Bay here, Captain.”

           “The Flyer has sent out a distress call they may be injured. We rendezvous with them in an hour.”

           “I’ll make sure I’m ready, Doctor out.”

           The hour couldn’t go fast enough. She couldn’t take the anticipation of what had happened to them. She hoped they were alright.

           “Tom,” she started at one point, “if they are injured be prepared to help out the Doctor.”

           “Yes, ma’am. What do you think happened to them?”

           “The Commander said something about subspace eddies before he left. I’m sure it had something to do with that.”

           “Subspace eddies,” Tom commented, “there probably won’t be much of them left.”

           “Lieutenant, your pessimism is not needed.”

           “Sorry, Captain.”

           In truth her own pessimism was ringing in her ears. Hearing Tom say it out loud just seemed to make it worse. She could feel Tuvok’s eyes on her back. She knew he could see her distress. She just hoped that no one else could. If some concern passed on her face she wished it would just be passed off as the general concern she had for her entire crew. She knew everyone on the bridge knew she had a close attachment to the two in danger but she couldn’t let them see that her concern was overwhelming her. She gripped the arm of her chair tightly. She had to keep in control of herself. This is exactly why she couldn’t have romantic relationships on the ship. She could care too much about what was going on with them that she would make mistakes. She couldn’t let her relationships impair her ability to command, her ability to make the hard choices.

           A small part of her mind knew that some of this anxiety came from the fact she thought she as losing them in more than one way. She had a feeling that these two would come back in a relationship and even though she would never enter into a relationship with them she knew that this would ruin any chance she had with them. She liked to imagine herself in a different situation when times were hard and now she wouldn’t even be able to that. She couldn’t lose them in both ways. She needed them at least alive so her friendships with them stayed as much. She could deal with the heartbreak as she had dealt with it many times before but she couldn’t deal with their deaths.   
XxXxX

           “Voyager to the Delta Flyer,” Kathryn called once they were in range, “if you can please respond.”

           “Delta Flyer here, Captain,” Seven voice came through. Kathryn was glad she was standing her knees had gone weak.

           “What’s your status?”

           “Commander Chakotay is injured. I’m not sure to what extent but he is unconscious. I’m fine but the Delta Flyer is in need of repairs.”

           “Alright I’m preparing to beam the Commander to Sick Bay, Seven, get the Flyer into the shuttle bay when we arrive,” Kathryn ordered.

           “Captain, with all due respect, I would prefer to go to Sick Bay with the Commander. I want to make sure he is alright,” Seven responded.

           “Understood. I will beam both of you to Sick Bay. Voyager out.” Kathryn took a breath. She was glad at least one of them was okay. She hoped that Chakotay would be fine once the Doctor had a chance to look at him. There was a lot the Doctor was able to handle. She has faith that he would be able to fix whatever was wrong with the Commander. “Tom, get to Sick Bay. I want you ready for their arrival.”

           “Yes, Captain.” Tom could tell she was anxious. It was unusual for him to be able to notice it. He guessed that the Captain’s feelings were strong for the Commander whatever type of feelings those may be. He got up from his chair and left the bridge.


	4. Chapter 4

Seven felt the dematerialization process begin and relief flooded through her. The Doctor would be able to save Chakotay.

           She stepped back once she felt her feet on the floor of Sick Bay and let the Doctor get to work. She hung back as she heard the Doctor telling commands to Tom. The Captain came in at some point but she didn’t notice until she felt a hand on her shoulder.

           “Seven,” Kathryn said softly. Seven looked up and Kathryn saw the worry in her eyes, the same worry that was in her. “Oh, Seven.” She embraced the former drone.

           Seven, not used to such contact was rigid at first but soon relaxed into the Captain’s arms. She was the only person Seven felt comfortable taking comfort in for this. She would have brushed off everyone else.

           It felt like an eternity that they were standing there, waiting to see what came of Chakotay.

           “He’ll be okay,” the Doctor said at last. “He just needs rest now.”

           “Can I stay with him,” Seven asked.

           “Of course,” the Doctor replied softly and gestured her over to the bio bed.

           “When he is up and moving, I’ll need both of your reports,” Kathryn said remembering her duty as their commanding officer.

           “Of course, Captain,” Seven said before walking over to Chakotay.

           “I guess we will have to wait on her surprise,” the Doctor said softly so Seven wouldn’t here.

           “I guess so,” Kathryn commented as she walked out of Sick Bay. She couldn’t stay there. All she wanted to do was cry and so she headed to her quarters.

XxXxX

A few hours later Chakotay woke up. Seven was holding her head in her hands and so she didn’t notice.

           “You’re here,” Chakotay croaked out, startlingly Seven.

           “I had to make sure you’re alright, as a friend of course,” she hastily added.

           “I would do the same for you, as a friend of course,” he replied.

           Neither of them knew where to go from there. They had both almost admitted that they had feelings for each other that weren’t platonic and they both knew the other had noticed. They didn’t want to say anything in case they were wrong and the other person hadn’t noticed anything. They were thankfully saved by the Doctor a moment later.

           “Ah, you’re up good.” The Doctor pulled out a medical tricorder and started analyzing Chakotay. “You are in good health. You just need some rest. I’m ordering you off duty for the next three days so you can recover.”

           “Yes, Doctor.”

           “You can go back to your quarters if you wish.”

           “Thank you, Doctor.” Chakotay slowly sat up and swung his legs off the bed. “Care to help me back to my quarters?” He asked Seven. She nodded and grabbed his arm so she could steady him as he got up from the bed.

           “Rest well,” The Doctor told him as he walked out of Sick Bay.

XxXxX

Kathryn was still her quarters a few hours later. As Seven as Chakotay walked out of Sick Bay, Kathryn heard her door chime. She ignored it. She didn’t want to see anybody right now. The door chimed again.

           “Captain,” Tuvok’s voice came from the other side of the door, “I know you’re in there.”

           “I don’t want to talk, Tuvok.”

           He said nothing in response and Kathryn hoped that he had left. A moment later however, she heard him security override her door and walk in.

           “I could court martial you for that,” she said not bothering to get up from her couch.

           “But you won’t.”

           “Why are you here and forcing yourself into my room, Tuvok.” She wanted him gone. She wanted her quarters to herself.

           “I am a concerned friend. You haven’t shut yourself away since the time we were in the void. I wish for you to talk to me.” He sat down next to her.

           “You don’t normally make house calls.” She continued to stare out her window.

           “It distresses me to see you in this state.”

           “It distresses me to be this way,” Kathryn conceded.

           “If you tell me what is going on I may be able to help.” He wished she would. In all of their twenty years of friends he had never seen her this way, not even when she lost her fiancé. For the first time since he sat now next to her, her eyes flickered over to him for a moment. Tuvok normally never let his concern show this much on his face.

           “Okay,” she was resigned to him staying and maybe she did own him and explanation. “At the start you know, I was missing Seven and Chakotay.”

           “Honestly, Kathryn,” he interrupted her, “I don’t think that is the start.”

           She sighed. He was right of course.

           “It started then, I guess with us getting stranded here. It started with Commander Chakotay coming aboard this ship. I’ve never had such an easy connection with someone. Not to say that the relationship was just as easy, quite the contrary. It was hard. It took a lot for me to trust him. But once I did by God was he charismatic. I started falling for him almost instantly after that. I don’t even remember how or when it started but we started having candle light dinners, as friends of course. Those nights with him were always amazing. I kept on trying to convince myself I only had friend feelings for him which of course was untrue.

           “Then we got stuck on that planet. I hadn’t been sure that we would ever make it off the planet. Of course, you knew I tried the best I could. Chakotay just tried to make life better for us, for me. He even built me a bath tub. I was so grateful for that. He admitted on the planet that he was in love with me. Oh, how I wanted to give into him right then and there. But I was still hoping to get off the planet and how could I be in command of him and be romantically involved with him. I put off talking about it with him, I put off giving in and shortly after we were rescued from the planet. I put up blockers. I put him back into the position of friend and make it clear I never wanted what had transpired on the planet talked about. And I was wonderfully fine for about a year maybe two. That is when Seven came aboard.

           “When I cut Seven off from the collective I assumed responsibility for her and as you know she fought me tooth and nail at the start. When she calmed down and started relaxing into her individual I found her an engaging woman. I found the desire to monitor her progress closely not because I was afraid she might run back to the Borg, no, at that point I knew she wasn’t going to do that. I found that desire because I wanted to be near her and soon I was falling for her too. I couldn’t help myself. She is so dynamic that she just pulled me in.

           “I’ve the seen the chemistry between the two of them, Chakotay and Seven, for a while now. They are a charismatic pair. I knew something would happen between them eventually. There haven’t been many times where both of them were gone at once. Or ever, I honestly don’t know at this point. They have been getting closer as of late and I think that was part of the reason why I reacted so much to them being gone this time around. As long as neither of them realized their potential together, as long as neither of them realize that they both had feelings for each other, then I allowed myself to imagine what it would be like with them. With this mission, this week of only two of them together. I worried that they would end up in a relationship. Part of me missing them was the fear that I would never get the chance to be with them. I know as the captain I cannot fraternize with my subordinates but it doesn’t mean I didn’t wish I could. And once they ended up together it would be the end of my imaging’s. My imagining in which I had spent so much time together almost became real to me.

           “When I heard that we had gotten a distress call, I was out of sorts. I could handle my almost real imaginings falling down around me but I couldn’t lose the actual people who inspired them. I loved them too much for that.

           “It was a sigh of relief when I knew both of them would be okay but back in Sick Bay Seven requested to stay with Chakotay. I knew at that point that something had happened between them while they had been away. My dreams would no longer be a reality and that should be fine and I should be happy that they’re happy but just, I can’t for some reason.”

           “It is okay to grieve the hope that you have lost. Grief is part of the process of letting go,” Tuvok said wisely.

           “It was only hope, it feels stupid to have to grieve over it. It’s not like anything actually happened”

           “But things did happen if only in your head and that is enough for you to grieve.” He raised an eyebrow.

           “But what if I don’t want to give up hope what if I don’t want to follow the rule that captains shouldn’t fraternize with their subordinates. What if I don’t want to be alone.”

           “You are anything but alone. You have an entire crew who would die for you without a second thought. Loyalty is a form of love and everyone on this ship is loyal to you. You have an entire family that you should not forget about. And you have me. I am your friend before I am anything else. You don’t need a romantic relationship to feel less lonely, all you need to realize is that this entire ship is here for you,” he explained.

           “You’re right Tuvok and besides if they’re in a relationship there is no room for me to be romantic with either of them.”

           “That might not be the case. After all monogamy is almost a remotely human concept and even then there are plenty of humans who disregard it.”

           “Are you saying I shouldn’t give up hope?”

           “I am saying that if you feel like there is still hope that you should keep it,” he paused, “and I trust you to recognize the difference between false hope and real hope.”

           “But what about that stupid rule.”

           “You always follow your own moral code and Star Fleet is lucky that it is aligned with it.”

           “But what if I lose my sense of command as I’m in a relationship with them.”

           “If anyone can handle Seven and Chakotay while still being their commander it is you. You never cease to amaze me Kathryn.”

           “I feel like I am caught in a bind. I don’t want to give myself false hope but if I could be with them it would make my world. I don’t know if my own moral code would allow me to fraternize with my subordinates. I don’t feel like I know anything right now.”

           “Then I would give yourself time to decide what it is you want to do. There is no rush in this.”

           “I don’t want to be frozen in inaction,” she sighed.

           “Choosing to wait, and to see what unfolds is not inaction. In and of itself it is a choice, it is an action. It is a strategic maneuver to allow for intelligence gathering. When one doesn’t have all the answers choosing to wait is the more prudent response.”

           “Laying it on a bit thick aren’t you,” she smiled at him. It was the first smile Tuvok had seen on her face since before Seven and Chakotay left for their mission.

           “I guess I was.”

           Kathryn laughed before her face fell again. “Would you lose any respect for me if I did decide to forgo that rule?”

           “I would not. My respect for you is not contingent on the way you lead your romantic life. If you were to, however, let it interfere with your command I would advise you to remove yourself from that situation. You are the head of this family. Your control in your command cannot be compromised by anything.”

           “I understand,” she paused, “I would like to be alone now. I need work over all of what was just said. I will go back on duty tomorrow. I need to sort out some of my emotions before I can effectively command again. I trust you will keep the bridge in working order for me.”

           “I’m sure I will.” He got up from the couch. “If you need anything else Kathryn please let me know.” He walked out of her quarters.

           “I will do just that.”


	5. Chapter 5

Seven was looking in at the damage that was done to the Flyer when B’Elanna walked in.

           “The Captain told me to look at it and see what all needed to be done to it,” B’Elanna said as she spotted Seven.

           “The damage should be easy to repair,” Seven commented.

           “Is that your professional opinion?” B’Elanna asked with her arms crossed.

           “If the Commander hadn’t be in critical condition we would have been able to make it back to Voyager eventually.”

           “What is it with you and the Commander right now anyways. Some crew members saw you helping him back to his quarters yesterday and it’s all anyone can talk about.”        

           “People need to stick to their own business and not mind and the Commanders.”

           “Of course.”

           “We are dating.”

           “Really? When did this happen?”

           Seven tried to hide her unease of lying to the Lieutenant. “We had our first date before we left for the week.”

           “How are we only hearing about this now?”

           “As I said before, people need to stick to their own business.”

           “Of course.”

           “There is something I would like to ask you though.” Seven prompted.

           “And what would that be?”

           “Chakotay and I were wondering if you would like to go on a double date with us. I don’t personally understand double dates but Chakotay assures me it will be amusing.” They had discussed no such thing but Seven figured she should make the best of it.

           “I will have to talk to Tom about it but I’m sure he’ll say yes, when are you thinking?”

           “About two weeks from now. We want to have out second date beforehand.”

           “What is your second date going to be?”

           “A picnic. I’ve prepared a holodeck program to set the mood.”

           “I look forward to hearing how it goes.”

           “I’m sure everyone is.”

           “A word of advice.,” B’Elanna started, “don’t listen to what the gossip on the ship is about when it comes to your relationship with Chakotay. They will have wild tales that don’t even make sense and five times out of ten there will be rumors of trouble in paradise. Ignore all of these and just focus on your relationship.”

           “Will do Lieutenant.”

           “Please, call me B’Elanna.”

           “B’Elanna.” Seven left her to her assessment. She would have to make that holodeck program she boasted about. It would take more time than she probably had. She wanted to make sure to keep up appearances though. And besides having a picnic with Chakotay would be nice.

XxXxX

Seven was in the hololab trying to figure out what would be the best setting for the picnic when Chakotay walked in.

           “Aren’t you supposed to be resting?” she asked as he placed a hand on the back of her shoulder. She liked the way it felt there.

           “The Captain came to see me and she expressed an interest in seeing you. She says she has something to talk to you about.”

           “Why didn’t she contact me herself?” Seven wondered. She felt like she was being avoided and though she was used to that from other crew members she did not like it coming from the Captain.

           “I’m not sure. She’s acting a little bit strangely right now.” He gave her shoulder a slight empathetic rub. He loved the feel of her under his hands. “What are you working on?”

           “Our second date. We might as well keep up appearances.”

           He nodded in affirmation.

           “Also speaking of dates, I asked B’Elanna if her and Tom wanted to go on a double date. I hope that is okay with you.”

           “It’s a wonderful idea. It will put aside any doubts anybody on this ship will be having.” He ran his hand down the length of her arm and squeezed her hand. “You should contact the Captain, she’s expecting you.”

           “Of course.”

           He gave her hand one last squeeze and left. Seven found she could breathe again. That simple touch seemed very intimate and almost overwhelmed Seven. Her shoulder now though felt regretfully empty.

           She pressed her communicator. “Seven to the Captain.”

           “Janeway here.”

           “Chakotay told me you wanted to see me.”

           “Yes, meet me at this location in fifteen minutes.”

           “Will do, Seven out.”

XxXxX

Kathryn pressed her communicator. “Janeway to the Doctor.”

           “Doctor here.”

           “Meet me at this location in ten minutes. Our plan is about to be enacted.”

           “Will do, Captain.”

           Kathryn got up from her seat in her ready room and headed out. She was glad that the surprise was finally panning out. It was only a day since Seven arrived back but she had originally hoped that the day of their arrival would have initiated the surprise. Circumstance prevented that from being the case. Kathryn found herself at the quarters she assigned Seven. There were still a few minutes until the Doctor arrived and so she stepped in.

           The quarters were bare but she knew Seven would decorate them to her taste. She didn’t know what Seven’s taste was so she imagined the quarters looking like a borg ship and she laughed. The Doctor walked in at that moment.

           “Something funny?” he asked.

           “It’s nothing, Doctor, I just let my imagination get away with me,” she explained.

           “When is Seven due to arrive?” The Doctor asked with anticipation. He was excited to give Seven her surprise.

           “In a few minutes. Is the device set up?”

           “Yes, it’s installed under her pillow.” They heard the door chime. “She is early.”

           “Enter,” Kathryn called.

           “You requested my presence, Captain. Hello Doctor.”

           “Yes, I did. We have a surprise for you. First these quarters are now yours.” Kathryn smiled at Seven’s incredulous look.

           “But-” Seven started.

           “Secondly,” the Doctor added, “I have created a device with help from the Captain, a new regeneration device for you. It is small and it is installed under your pillow. You’ll be able to sleep on an actual bed.”

           Seven was overwhelmed. She had hoped, rather dreamed of having her own quarters one day but she never thought it would actually happen. “I don’t know what to say but thank you.” Her voice cracked. She was on the verge of crying but she had to keep it in. A tear leaked out anyways. “I greatly appreciate this Captain and Doctor.”

           “We’ll leave you to it then.” Kathryn turned to leave.

           “We hope you have a housewarming,” the Doctor commented before he walked out the door.

           Kathryn smiled at his retreating form. She was now alone with Seven. “I hope you have a housewarming as well. I look forward to seeing what you do with the place.”

           “I’ll make sure to have you over personally before the housewarming, maybe for dinner.” She wanted to thank the Captain with more than just dinner but dinner would have to do.

           “I would love to Seven. I look forward to having an invitation.” Kathryn placed a hand on Seven’s shoulder. It sent electricity down her arm.

           “I look forward to giving it to you.”

           “I’ll leave you now, so you can get acquainted with your new quarters.” Kathryn let her hand slip from Seven’s shoulder. Seven wanted to grab onto her hand but found she couldn’t make the move to do so. Kathryn walked out of the room.

           Seven stood there breathless for a moment. “Seven to Chakotay, can you come to my location. I want to show you something.”

           A few minutes later the door chimed.

           “Come in,” Seven said. Chakotay walked slowing into the room.

           “Whose quarters are these?” he asked as he put a hand on her lower back. She wished he would stop doing that. She couldn’t think when he was touching her.

           “Mine.”

           Chakotay looked at her incredulously.

           “The Captain and the Doctor surprised me with quarters and a new regeneration device that fits under a pillow.” Happiness spilled from Seven. She was excited to have a place of her own. “I was thinking that maybe we could have our double date here. We could cook dinner for Tom and B’Elanna.”

           “That sounds perfect.” He was so close to her he could spell a slight flowery scent coming from her. He wanted to get in closer so he could get a better taste of the smell. Nuzzling his head into her neck would do just fine, maybe even a kiss or two. He sighed. He would have to stop thinking like that if he is to control himself around her.

           For a moment, Seven thought, they felt like a real couple and not one fake dating. She reveled in that moment. She couldn’t let it last however. She stepped away from him.

           “I should get back to my duties,” she told him before walking out the door leaving him alone in her new quarters.

           When Seven returned to the Astrometric’s lab she found she couldn’t concentrate on her tasks. She was excited to begin decorating her new quarters. It was an opportunity she was glad to have. Her mind would also flicker to her date with Chakotay scheduled a few days from now. She was apprehensive about it. She knew they had to keep up appearances but this was so much like a real date that she was nervous about. There would be no resetting the holodeck in case she messed up. How was she supposed to fake date someone who she really wanted to date? How was this date supposed to go? Would they actually do date like things? Or would they just act like the friends they are.

           B’Elanna walked in to the Astrometric’s lab.

           “I just talked to Tom,” she started, “And while he was surprised about the arrangement he would be happy to go on a double date with you and Chakotay, as would I.”

           “I look forward to it then. I’ll make sure to tell Chakotay and we’ll get back to you with a time.”  

           “There is one more thing,” B’Elanna paused, “can you help me with the Flyer? There is more damage than you estimated.”

           “Of course. Give me a few minutes to finish what I am working on and I will be right with you.”

           B’Elanna nodded then left the lab. Seven guessed that her presence was requested so that B’Elanna could find out more information about Chakotay and her supposed relationship. It was after all a novel and unexpected thing. She sighed. She knew this was expected but she wasn’t sure she was prepared for it. Chakotay and her had talked long about what their relationship would be like that it did almost feel real. She took more time with her task than she need to. She didn’t want to face an interrogation.

           B’Elanna was underneath the helm when Seven arrived.

           “Ah, Seven, I’m glad you’re here.”

           “What do you need help with Lieutenant?”

           “Right now, you can work on fixing the helm. I have a few calculations to make before we can make more repairs.”

           Seven took B’Elanna’s place under the helm.

           “You looked slightly relieved when I told you to repair the helm. What were you expecting?” B’Elanna asked as she took a seat at ops to start her calculations.

           “Questions, about me and Chakotay.”

           “I got the information I needed about that yesterday when we talked. I am curious to know more but I figured that can wait until our double date. Chakotay is my best friend outside of Tom, I trust him.” She smiled at Seven. “Now that helm won’t fix itself.”

           Seven got back to her work relieved.


	6. Chapter 6

Chakotay hated being confined to his quarters. He knew that he was supposed to be resting but he’d rather being doing something, like spending time with Seven. He was looking forward to their date even if it was just to keep up appearances and not the real thing. He shook his head. He shouldn’t be thinking about things like this. He had to keep reality from fantasy. His cock and bull plan is what led him to this frustrating situation. He didn’t want to be fake dating Seven, he thought to himself for what felt like the thousandth time. He didn’t know how to talk to her, how to ask her if she really wanted to date him. He didn’t know if he could. He was afraid she might say no. He could be considered a brave man but this simple thing terrified him. He was also afraid that if they did truly date he would lose his shot with the Captain. He didn’t know who he wanted more but he didn’t know if he was capable of more than one relationship at a time or if either of them would be okay with it. He couldn’t stay in his quarters and brood. He had to go out and do something.

           He left his quarters and found his feet leading him to the Captain’s ready room. He hasn’t seen her since he arrived back from his away mission and besides he needed to give her his report.

           “Enter,” she called. “Commander aren’t you supposed to be resting?” she asked as she looked up from the pad she was reading, Seven’s report.

           “I am not very good at resting,” he explained.

           “Have a seat then.” She gestured to the spot on the couch next to her. “I’m always glad for our time together.”

           “As am I.”

           “So, report aside how was your trip?”

           “You make it sound like a vacation.” He smiled.

           “I guess I do,” she laughed. She motioned for him to answer the question.

           “It was eventful. Seven and I really connected. Well I guess we already were. We just decided to be open about it.” Chakotay didn’t realize it, Kathryn did, that he had gotten this wistful and happy look on his face when he started talking about Seven. It nearly broke Kathryn’s heart. She of course wouldn’t stand in his way but she had hoped for a second that they weren’t as connected as they seemed.

           “That sounds wonderful,” she managed to get out.

           “It is.” He paused as he examined her face. He noticed she was slightly preoccupied and he guessed that it was because of him and Seven. She seemed like she was trying to hide that she as upset. “You know we haven’t had one of our dinners in a while. We should make sure to arrange one here soon within the next few weeks.”

           “Definitely.” A smiled lit up her face.

           He grabbed her hand for a moment. “I greatly enjoy our dinners together.” He got up from his spot and left.

           Kathryn was left there stunned. The conversation seemed contradictory. He seemed very much so fallen with Seven but when he had grabbed her hand and assured her about his like for their dinners he had seem taken with her. She didn’t know what to make of it. She grabbed Seven’s report and started reading it again. She would put it to the back of her mind and let her subconscious figure it out and Seven’s report would be ample distraction.

XxXxX

Chakotay’s heart was beating fast as he left the Captain’s ready room. What was with him lately. He almost made a fool of himself to her before he left for his away mission and now he almost did it again. This time he might actually have. He didn’t know how the Captain was responding to him grabbing her hand and telling her how much he enjoyed their dinner together. It’s just when he saw her face that way. He could tell she was sad from the news that him and Seven were connected. He felt like he needed to cheer her up somehow. It was after all his plan that had led to this. He took a deep breath in the turbo life back to his quarters. Everything would work out right, he lied to himself.

XxXxX

The days passed and Chakotay and Seven fell back into the rhythm of a star ship. Seven was almost always on edge. She kept on getting impertinent questions by crew member she barely even knew about her relationship with Chakotay. A glare usually would silence them and make them remember their manners but if it didn’t she learned to filter out those questions. Chakotay of course got questions as well but not by random crew. B’Elanna damn near attacked him when she saw him again. He made sure to answer all her question to her standards or else she wouldn’t have left. The only person that didn’t ask either of them a single thing was the Captain. She kept her distance from that topic. The Doctor almost berated Seven for not telling him sooner about their relationship, after all he was one of her closest friends. She of course played her part well in explaining the situation away. After a week had passed she had gotten very good at lying and no longer felt remorse for the people she lied to. This thing they were doing had to be done right and no one could know but them that they weren’t in a real relationship.

XxXxX

Seven got dressed in her partially decorated quarters. It was the night for her and Chakotay’s date. She found that her stomach wasn’t quite feeling well. She suspected it was nerves, though it could easily be Neelix’s cooking. He would swear up and down that he prepared things properly but sometimes she doubted that. She looked at herself in her red dress again. She hoped it was appropriate. She wasn’t entirely sure it was but she wanted to make an impression. She looked at herself one more time before she allowed herself to leave her quarters. She didn’t want to be late for their date.

           As she walked the hallways to Chakotay’s quarters she felt eyes on her at all times. She felt like they were making fun of her. She kept her head held high and tried to ignore them. She chimed Chakotay’s door. He was looking properly handsome when answered it. If she had been prone to fainting fits she might have experienced one then.

           “You look gorgeous,” he said, he meant it but he was very aware of the other people in the hall at this time.

           “Thank you, and you look handsome.”

           “Shall we?” he asked as he held out his arm for her to take. She looped her arm through his and they set off down the hall. “I look forward to see what program you have created for this.”

           “It’s something special I assure you.” Seven was not entirely sure how to talk to him. They were on a date yes but it was a fake date. It didn’t mean anything.

           They fell into silence as they continued their journey to the holodeck, neither of them knowing what to say to the other.

           Chakotay glanced over to her several times, admiring her beauty. He was nothing less than stunned at how good she looked. He looked at her red lined mouth and wanted to kiss her. He couldn’t though. He had to keep some sort of line. They weren’t really dating after all.

           Seven actively did not look at Chakotay. She thought that if she did her resolve not to make a fool of herself would weaken. She could feel his eyes on her occasionally. She wanted him to speak up and most of all she wanted him to kiss her. She wanted to feel the real Chakotay’s lips pressed up against hers. She almost shivered at the thought.

           They finally arrived at the holodeck. They opened the doors and Seven was relieved to find that the Doctor had followed her instruction to the letter. He was glad to help set up the picnic while she got ready for it. In front of them was a forest path. They could hear the birds singing and feel a gentle breeze play upon their skin. They walked up to the path to a hill and a break in the trees. When they looked down they could see an entire forest spread out before them with a river cutting through it.

           “It’s perfect.” Chakotay was stunned at the level of detail put into it. He didn’t know when Seven got the time.

           “Thank you. Shall we sit?” She gestured to the blanket on the ground before them.

           “Of course.” Chakotay lowered himself to the ground and she followed suit. “What’s on the menu tonight.”

           “You’ll see,” she said as she poured him a glass of champagne. She next pulled out a plate of cheese and grapes from the basket beside her. “Here,” she held out a grape and a piece of cheese for him to eat. He took it from her fingers with his mouth. She could feel his lips close around her fingers and she felt his tongue brush up against her finger tips as she dropped the food in his mouth. She was startled by this intimacy. She quickly glanced away and hoped he didn’t notice the slight blush that graced her cheeks.

           He closed his eyes and hummed appreciation. “This is good. What cheese is that?” he wondered.

           “It’s my own special blend,” she told him.

           “How did you have time to make cheese?”

           “I didn’t. I told the replicator what to make.”

           “Even that is astonishing,” he admitted. He picked up a grape and a piece of cheese himself this time and placed it in his mouth. It didn’t taste as good as when she fed it to him. He picked up a grape and piece of cheese for her to eat. “Open your mouth.” She gave him a look before complying. He gently placed the food on her tongue and ‘accidently’ allowed his fingers to brush her lips. She fluttered her eyes closed for a moment before locking eyes with Chakotay as she savored the food her fed her. She had tasted her food before now but it hadn’t tasted this good. She made a little moan before swallowing. Chakotay wanted to hear that sound again. It had felt like eccentricity running though his veins.

A small strand of hair had gotten loose from braided crown and Chakotay brushed it back behind her ear letting his fingers linger on her neck. He pushed his fingers into her hair and gently pulled her towards him. He kissed her softly. He was about to apologize for kissing her, they weren’t really dating after all, when she kissed him. It wasn’t gentle, it was urgent and needy.

           When she broke away from him, her eyes were wide. “I’m sorry I shouldn’t have done that.” She got up and ran out of the holodeck.

           “Don’t be,” Chakotay muttered to himself. He cleaned up the picnic and told the computer to transport it to Seven’s quarters. He slowly left the holodeck admiring the detail that Seven had put into this program. He shut off the program as the holodeck door closed behind him.


	7. Chapter 7

He wanted to make sure Seven was alright but he knew he shouldn’t contact her. He had messed up. He had made a fool of himself. Why did he kiss her? He definitely shouldn’t have done that. Why didn’t just let things lie? If he wouldn’t have done anything they would have had a perfectly enjoyable fake date. They would still be talking to each other. He wished he could talk to someone about it but this charade they had going didn’t allow for that, didn’t allow for anyone else to know that they were fake dating. They had a double day in about five days, he hoped that they would talk before that. At least to get the story straight.

           But they didn’t talk. They avoided each other. Each of them thinking they were the one who made the date go wrong. Their avoidance of each other didn’t go unnoticed by the crew. There were rumors that there was trouble in paradise already. They all knew it was too good to be true. Most blamed Seven. B’Elanna knew that there was more to the story than what the rumors were expressing. She had known Chakotay for a long time. There was more going on in him than just regret and self-blame. She had tried to ask him but he only brushed her off. She knew she would probably figure out what was going on when their double date came around. She was looking forward to seeing Seven and Chakotay interact. It would tell her a lot.

           The day finally arrived. Seven and made sure her quarters, the place which the date was being held, was properly decorated. It would be her first-time hosting something in her own quarters and she wanted it to be perfect. She was nervous to see Chakotay. He would arrive first of course. She didn’t know if she could talk to him. She knew she must at least a little, at least for appearances sake. She didn’t know how much longer she could do this. One way or another something was going to have to give. She just hoped she was still friends with Chakotay afterwards.

           Her door chimed. “Enter.” She was stunned again by how handsome Chakotay looked out of uniform.

           “I brought you these.” He produced flowers from behind his back.

           “They’re beautiful.” She grabbed them from him. “What are you sorry for?” she asked.

           “What?”

           “The flowers, the type and color tell me you’re sorry about something,” she explained.

           “You have a good eye,” he said awkwardly. He watched her procure a vase from the replicator. She filled it with water and placed the bouquet in the water. “You’re supposed to cut the stems before you do that.” She looked at him questioningly. “Here.” He took the flowers out of the water and grabbed the knife that was laying on the counter of the kitchen Seven had created. “You cut them at an angle. It helps them stay alive longer.” He cut a few before offering the knife to her. She took it from him and moved into his space. Not wanting to risk making a fool of himself again, Chakotay stepped back from her.

           “You still haven’t told me what you are apologizing about.”

           “Kissing you,” he said softly as the door chimed. Tom and B’Elanna where here.

           “Enter,” Seven called as she finished cutting the stems and placing them in water again.

           “We brought wine,” Tom announced as they walked into the room.

           “That was unnecessary but thank you,” Seven said as she took the bottle from them.

           “Those flowers are beautiful,” B’Elanna commented.

           “Chakotay has good taste,” Seven replied grabbing a cork screw to open the wine.

           “As do you from the looks of it,” B’Elanna admired Seven’s quarters.

           “So, what are we having for dinner?” Tom asked Chakotay.

           “I don’t know. Seven is surprising us all tonight,” Chakotay replied smiling what he thought to be a charming smile. B’Elanna caught the undertones to it, Tom did not. She also noticed how far apart they were standing from each other. They hadn’t glanced at each other since her and Tom walked in. There was definitely something going on she just didn’t know what yet.

           “You will know as we eat it.” She smiled at them. “Why don’t you two have seat and we will get started.”

           Seven and Chakotay grabbed the plates Seven had prepared and set them down on the table. They went back for a bread basket and B’Elanna noticed Chakotay’s hand almost on Seven’s back as they walked together back to the table. He seemed almost afraid to touch her.

           When all of them started eating, B’Elanna paid more attention to them that she did her food, though the food was good. Seven and Chakotay always leaned away from each other but it seemed to be a strain to do so. Here at the table they allowed themselves an occasional glance at each other. These looks weren’t what one would expect from a couple. These looks were filled with longing and fear. By the time everyone had finished the plate in front of them B’Elanna was convinced that they weren’t actually in a relationship despite it looking like one.

           “I’m convinced,” B’Elanna started. The other three looked at her questioningly. “You guys are in something alright but it’s not a relationship.” Chakotay and Seven started to protest. “Don’t. I know what I see. You guys are faking to be in a relationship for some unknown reason.” She paused. “Honestly I don’t care why and I won’t say anything to anyone but you two need to figure this out.”

           Silence followed her proclamation. Seven and Chakotay didn’t know how to respond to her. Chakotay was slightly relieved that she had found out. He had been wanted to talk to someone who wasn’t Seven since they started this. Now he would be able to.

           “Desert?” Seven asked after a few moments.

           “Of course,” Tom replied hoping to break some of the tension in the room. Seven got up from the table to grab the desert.

           “I will tell you everything at a later time,” Chakotay told B’Elanna.

           She nodded, “It would be rude after all to not appreciate all the hard work Seven put into tonight.” She looked at Seven who was still away from her seat. “It is a fantastic meal you have made tonight Seven.”

           “Thank you,” Seven replied. She had been caught off guard by B’Elanna and so her ability to socialize had been interrupted. She brought the deserts back to the table and silence fell once more but this time thankfully because everyone was enjoying their food too much to talk. Seven had advanced significantly in her cooking skills and everyone enjoyed her food. She was also less uptight about the salt.

           When everyone had finished their desert Tom ad B’Elanna left. They knew that Chakotay and Seven had a lot to talk about.

           “What do we want to do about this?” Chakotay asked.

           “I think it is too soon to tell if this has had any effect on the Captain. Why don’t we give it until the end of the month, give it until my housewarming party and then reassess.” Seven was not ready to let go of Chakotay yet even if they were only fake dating.

           “That sounds like a plan,” Chakotay got up from his chair.

           “Also,” Seven started.

           “Yes?”

           “Don’t be sorry that you kissed me. I’m the one who should be apologizing, for continuing it.”

           Chakotay opened the door. “Don’t be,” he said before walking out and leaving Seven there alone.

XxXxX

Chakotay wandered through the next few days in a haze. He wanted to go talk to B’Elanna about what was going on but every time he left to go see her he would find himself somewhere else. He was afraid of admitting how much he had made a mess of this situation. He knew this plan wasn’t going to end well but he didn’t think it was going to be this convoluted when it did. Thankfully though, he had dinner with the Captain to look forward to. It was tonight and he hoped it would bring much needed relaxation. He always enjoyed his dinners with the Captain he didn’t think this one would be any different.

           He arrived at her quarters at the specified time. He wondered what replicator meal he was going to get tonight. He would never forget the time she burnt the meatloaf. He still wasn’t entirely sure how she managed that one. He chuckled to himself as he chimed the Captain’s door.

           “Come in!” she called before swearing.

           “You better not be burning our dinner again,” Chakotay said as he walked in.

           “Don’t worry I’m not,” she laughed. “The plate was hot.”

           “What are we having this evening?” Chakotay sat down in his usual spot at the table.

           “Stir-fry and rice.” She set a hot plate down in front of him.

           “It looks delicious,” he said as he watched her settle down across from him with her own steaming plate of food.

           The dinner started out fantastic. It was just like old times. It was just what Chakotay needed. It helped ground him and clear his mind of this mess he created. It made him see that he needed to tell Seven what was really going on his head if they were to get out of this in any positive way. He didn’t want to lose her but he couldn’t fake date her anymore even for the week they had left before her housewarming.

           When they sat back, relaxing with their wine glasses in their hands Seven was brought up.

           “You know I always knew you and Seven had a connection. I was just waiting for you two to get together.”

           Chakotay’s heart sunk. He hated lying to Kathryn. “She charmed her way into my heart.”

           Kathryn snorted. “Seven is a very dear friend of mine but I would never call her charming. It was more likely you charmed her. I’ve seen that smile of yours.” Kathryn took a sip of her wine.

           “And what are you implying?” He smiled.

           “That you could charm your way anywhere. You could even make this poor captain question her resolve that she put in place all those years ago.”

           Chakotay was stunned to hear that. “I didn’t think anything could get through that, not even candle lit dinners.”

           “We’ve been friends for a while now.”

           “A situation I wasn’t always inclined to be in. You made it clear though that that is where you wanted us.”

           “I know but now I’m questioning that decision,” she said softly.

           “Why are you telling me this now? When I’m in a relationship with Seven?” She had just about confessed that she wanted him, he just needed a little bit more.

           “Because, I don’t know.” She got up from her chair. “I find I realize what I want when I cannot have it.”

           “You want me?” He hoped that she would say yes.

           She gave a partial nod. “Not only you.”

           “Seven?”

           She gave her partial nod again. “But this is only speculative. I have my command to think of. I cannot compromise that.”

           Just when he was getting close she closed him off again. “Of course, Captain.” He saw her wince at her tittle. “I should get going. I have a long day ahead of me.” He set his glass on the table and left without waiting for a response from her.

           His plan had worked but she was afraid at this present moment to go any further. His resolve to end his fake dating with Seven before the end of the month had crumpled. He knew if he was going to get the Captain out of her shell he had to continue with the charade. He hoped with the news that the Captain was also interested in her, Seven would agree that they should continue this charade longer. He didn’t know how long it would have to last but it would have to last a while longer. He smiled slightly. Things were going better than he anticipated, well maybe. He still had the feeling that this all was going to end badly.

 

 


	8. Chapter 8

Why had she said all those thing to Chakotay? She wanted to blame the wine but she knew that wasn’t the case. She had been wanting to say something to him even before Seven and him had come back from their away mission in a relationship. It was as if she had reached a breaking point but she couldn’t allow herself to continue breaking. There was too much of a risk. She didn’t want this to go terribly wrong. But she knew it already was. She just didn’t know how to make it right again when she didn’t even know what she wanted. Well she knew what she wanted just didn’t know if she could act on it. How does one remove a barrier that has been there for years, that has been a pillar of one’s sanity? She always knew Chakotay would be by her side as one of her closest friends. It would be risky to make him more. She couldn’t stand to lose him and with romantic entanglement there was always the risk of loss, the risk of losing everything you once were, even friends. She needed him as a friend first and foremost. She might risk it at some point but right now she didn’t think that she could. His friendship was too dear to her.

           Could she risk it with Seven? She had after all known Seven for less time than Chakotay. It wouldn’t be as much of a risk. She shook her head. She knew that was a lie. It would be just as much of a risk. But could she stand the former borg’s disdain if a relationship were to fail? She didn’t want to have to. It didn’t matter the answer if she could stand it, she didn’t want to have to. It was not a situation she wanted to be in and she had a choice to not be in it. So she wouldn’t even try with Seven either.

           But that didn’t sit well with her either. She wanted a relationship, a romantic relationship with both of them but she knew at this moment in time she couldn’t make the first move. However, if they were to make the move, she knew that she would say yes to either of them or even to both of them. She hoped that the would make the first move. She knew though that they wouldn’t she had been the one to put up the wall and it would have to be her job to take them down. They would not move without know her walls were down. She would have to make the first move but she couldn’t yet. She was too afraid and frozen in fear was not a state she was used to being in.

XxXxX

Seven was passing in her quarters, fixing things that didn’t need fixing. Her dinner with the Captain was to commence shortly. She wanted to make sure everything was perfect. She knew Chakotay had had his dinner with the Captain but she didn’t know how it went. They still hadn’t talked since their double date and their resolve to continue their fake dating until the end of the month. Until a few days from now. Seven’s housewarming was arriving shortly. She couldn’t worry about that right now. She only had room in her head to be apprehensive about her dinner with the Captain. In was in this dinner she hoped she would see if the Captain had any romantic interest for her. She found she didn’t like the idea of rejection, especially from the Captain.

           Her door chimed and she nearly jumped out of her skin. She took a deep breathe to steady herself. “Come in,” she called.

           The Captain walked in looking beautiful in a dress. Seven found she couldn’t speak for a moment. “I brought wine,” Kathryn said. She knew the wine wouldn’t help her current mental state but it certainly couldn’t hurt, not after her dinner with Chakotay, which she was sure Seven had heard about.

           “Thank you, it is much appreciated,” Seven sputtered out when she found her mind again. Kathryn was amused by Seven’s awkwardness.

           “What’s for dinner?” Kathryn asked as she sat down at the table.

           “Shrimp fettuccini alfredo. I replicated the necessary ingredients and then made the rest from scratch.”

           “Impressive Seven,” Kathryn commented before taking a bite. “Very impressive,” she moaned after she swallowed. The sound of Kathryn’s moan sent electricity through Seven. She wanted to hear that noise again. She didn’t dare do anything about it right now though. And she resented her lack of bravery in this situation. She ate her food, allowing the Captain to lead the conversation. It was pleasant, taking this time with the Captain to just enjoy oneself. It wasn’t something that she got to do often. They were so often bombarded with the unknown that Seven at time didn’t get time to herself. It was at least the excuse Seven made. She could have easily made more time for the Captain but she didn’t for the fact that she didn’t always know how to act around her. Seven didn’t really know how to act around anyone but least of all the Captain. So, she kept to herself. She made excuses for work and the like. She decided then and there that she wouldn’t any more. This meal was so pleasant she wanted more of them. She wanted one every day if she could. She knew that was unrealistic. She knew she wouldn’t be able to keep up with them anyways. She needed to make time for herself and now with her own quarters she could, without hesitation. There would be no one wandering through her space because they were looking for something. This space was hers and only hers. She could do anything in it. Like kiss the Captain.

           Seven kept that thought in her head as she laid dessert out on the table. It was a chocolate molten cake on a single plate. She placed a fork in front of the Captain and one in front of herself. Seven tore away a chunk of the cake with her fork and then offered it to Kathryn. Kathryn leaned forward and pulled the cake off the fork with her lips. She hummed with appreciation.

           “Seven, that is delectable,” Kathryn said with her mouth still partially full.

           Seven just smiled. She took her finger and dipped in the molten chocolate, she held it out for Kathryn. Kathryn was surprised by the offer, she nonetheless placed her lips around Seven’s finger and licked the chocolate from it. Kathryn fluttered her eyes closed. She let out a long moan, that made Seven pull the Captain close and kiss her. Seven got up from the table, doing her best to keep in contact with Kathryn. She walked around to the other side and pulled the Captain up. Seven led Kathryn to the couch. She sat down and indicated that Kathryn should straddle her. The Captain hitched up her dress to her upper thigh and placed a leg on each side of Seven. Kathryn brushed her loose hair to the side before leaning down and kissing Seven. Seven placed her hands on Kathryn’s thighs and let the tip of her fingers trail just under the hem of Kathryn’s dress.

           They continued on this way for several more minutes, neither of them brave enough to go further but both of them wanting to. Seven was thinking about letting her hands rest higher on Kathryn’s thighs when Chakotay walked in unannounced with flowers in his hands.

           Kathryn and Seven were stunned. At the sound of the door, Kathryn had turned but when she saw Chakotay standing there, she couldn’t move. Chakotay saw her straddling Seven, his supposed romantic partner. Chakotay eyes ran over the scene and noticed where Seven had placed her hands. Seven noticed his look and quickly removed her hands. The absence of heat from the removal of Seven’s hands made Kathryn come to her senses. She slowly, defiantly stood up and fixed her dress. She wasn’t embarrassed by being caught.

           She nodded at Seven. “That you for the dinner,” she said and walked out.

           “I had news but you seemed to have figure that out already,” he turned and left.

           “Chakotay!” Seven called after him but he was gone. She would never forget the look on his face. He seemed heartbroken yet unsurprised.

XxXxX

Chakotay fled from Seven’s quarters. He must have dropped the flowers somewhere because when he reached B’Elanna’s quarters he found he no longer had them in his hands. He rang the chime.

           When B’Elanna saw his face she told him, “Holodeck now. I know an invigorating training program.” She looked him up and down for a moment. “You’ll need to change. Come in,” she moved from the door so he could walk past. “You’re broader than Tom but I think he might have something to fit you.” She pulled him into her and Tom’s room and pulled out some clothes for him. “Change, I’ll be waiting on the couch.” She noticed when she said ‘couch’ he flinched. She wouldn’t ask anything now. He would just bite her head off if she did. She found that once he was exhausted from exercise he was more open to questions. A few minutes later he walked out. The clothes she had given him were ill-fitting, but they would do for the moment. She took him to the holodeck and there she started the necessary program.

           Three hours later they were sitting on the holodeck floor, panting and sweating.

           “Are you going to tell me what happened?” B’Elanna asked.

           For once he held nothing back. He told her about his plan with Seven, his dinner with the Captain, and what he just walked in on.

           “First,” B’Elanna started, “you’re stupid for just walking in unannounced. Even if you two had been really dating that still would have been a bad idea. Two, you are so in over your head. What in the world possessed you to start this? You had to know it wasn’t going to end well.”

           “I did. But the lure of spending time with Seven, and the lure of maybe fully capturing the Captain’s attention was too much to resist.” He rolled his head to look at her. “I think I may be in,” he paused, “I know I’m in love with both of them but how can that be?”

           “Would you ever just have one friend?” B’Elanna asked.

           “No.”

           “Then why would you just have one romantic relationship?”

           “But that isn’t how it works. You and Tom for instance.”

           “Tom and I are open to other relationships. We’ve talked about it many times, we just don’t think we will find anyone else on this ship unless we pick up more stragglers which to be fair is rather likely.” B’Elanna laughed. “Love cannot be restricted. It had no bounds. If you love more than one person than you love more than one person. One of those loves is not made less by you having another. It just means that you are so filled with love that it cannot be contained with one person and that the more love you give the more love you have.”

           “But what if they don’t see it in the same way?”

           “All you have to do is talk to them to find out. Express your desires and hope. I don’t know the Captain or Seven as well as you do but if you love them, then I’m pretty hopeful they’re not going to break your heart. You’re not one to focus on people who are not compassionate and understanding.”

           Chakotay laid his head on B’Elanna’s shoulder. “Thank you. You’re my best friend you know that right?”

           “Of course.” B’Elanna stroked his hair. “It’s time for you to go to bed. And remember you need to make time to talk to both of them.”

           “I will.”


	9. Chapter 9

He tried to find the time within the days before Seven’s housewarming but Seven was avoiding him and the Captain was always mysteriously busy.

XxXxX

Seven wasn’t apt to feel embarrassed by anything. Embarrassment was a supercilious emotion to her. But her cheeks warmed every time she thought about how that night ended, with her calling out Chakotay’s name, with her picking up the flowers he discarded in his flight from her. She hadn’t talked to the Captain and the Captain hadn’t talked to her. She knew though that on several accounts that Chakotay had been trying to talk to her but she couldn’t talk to him right now. She was, embarrassed. She felt like a fool and it broke her heart every time she remembered the look on his face. She was the cause for his distress and that was abhorrent to her. The logical part of her knew that talking to him like he wanted to would probably help fix this mess but there was a small but very loud part that said talking to him would make everything worse. So she avoided him.

XxXxX

Kathryn was stubborn. She knew she shouldn’t have kissed Seven they way she did. She could have deescalated the situation long before the time when Chakotay walked in but she hadn’t wanted and after all Seven had started the contact and Kathryn felt no shame in continuing it. She knew she shouldn’t have done it though. Seven and Chakotay where presumably in a close relationship and making out with Seven violated that. She tried to care but all she could think about was doing it again. And despite his attempts to talk to her, Kathryn thought Chakotay a moot point. The wall she had built up that kept him out was still very much so there and she didn’t think it would be coming down any time soon. It helped that now she had Seven to think about. A not so small part of her felt terribly guilty about the whole situation because though she played at indifference she was by no means feeling it. She knew she loved Chakotay just as much as she loved Seven. She knew if given the right circumstances she would fall into Chakotay’s arms. It was painful to her to know that she hurt Chakotay. She had been stupid. She hated feeling stupid, so she was stubborn an indifferent instead.

XxXxX

Seven sat on her bed two hours before her housewarming, half dressed. She didn’t want to do this but it was too late to cancel. She didn’t know how she was going to respond to the Captain or Chakotay. She took a deep breath. Everything would be find. She was just being ridiculous. She just had to keep her head held high.

           And that’s what she did as she finished getting ready for her party, as she laid the treats out, and she placed the plates in a neat pile, as she opened a bottle of champagne and fill several flutes with it. She was ready when Chakotay arrived just early enough for them to still look like they were dating. She was thankful it would end tonight. She didn’t know how much longer it could go on.

           When the rest of the guests arrived, she was ready for them. Most of them had seen her place at least once before. They congratulated her anyway on her choice of decorations and said how much they enjoyed the place. She thanked them each in turn and expressed her appreciation for the gifts they gave. The Doctor beamed at her as if she was his own daughter. Seven appreciated this the most. She was glad of his affection for her. It made her feel safe.

           About halfway through the intended duration of the party Chakotay pulled her aside. “Can I talk to you for a moment?” he asked. She knew this had been coming. She nodded to him. “I know we said we would end out charade tonight but I have some news.”

           “Which would be?”

           “Now, I know you might have already guessed at this because of the situation I found you the other day,” Chakotay noticed the color that graced Seven’s cheeks. “But in my dinner with her she damn near full expressed interest for both of us. Our plan is working.”

           Seven was stunned by that. She did not expect this conversation. She didn’t think Chakotay wanted to be near her after what he had walked in on but here he was expressing a desire to keep on being near her. Even if the reasons weren’t solely for the want of being near her, it didn’t matter. It was almost a relief to think that Chakotay didn’t think that badly of her.

           “There is one more thing, I don’t mind that you and the Captain are getting close. I was just surprised when I walked in on it. I’m sorry I should have knocked before entering.”

           Seven could tell that there was more to it than just that but she took his words at face value for now.

           “I appreciate that.” Seven was about to say more when the Captain walked up to them.

           “I’m sorry to interrupt but I had a thought just now that I wanted to share with you. Have you guys thought about adding a third into your relationship?”

           They didn’t have time to answer. Their puzzled faces turned panic when red alert sounded and all the senior officers and Seven fled to their stations.

XxXxX

“Report,” the Captain called as she arrived on the bridge.

           “Three unknown alien vessels are attacking us.”

           “Try hailing them,” the Captain said as she stumbled to her seat.

           “There’s no response,” Kim grunted.

           “Tuvok arm phasers and fire.”

           The rocked. “Decks two through nine have hull breaches. That last hit took out half of crew quarters,” Ensign Kim reported.

           “What happened to our shields?” Kathryn asked incredulously.

           “They were down before we entered the bridge, Captain,” Tuvok explained.

           “Have our phasers been affecting them?” The Captain asked.

           “Moderately so.”

           “Alright, Tuvok arm a few photon torpedoes and aim for their weapon systems. I still want to know why we’re suffering an unprovoked attack.”

           Tuvok nodded before following her orders. It took a few hits before each ship’s weapons had been disabled.

           “Hail them.”

           “They’re responding.”

           “On screen.”

           “I am Kathryn Janeway of the Starship Voyager why have you attacked us?”

           “You’re in our space,” the alien said.

           “I was unware we were crossing into restricted territory if you inform us of your boundaries we will gladly go around.”

           “We will transmit them to you.” The alien cut off communication.

           “We’ll they’re a pleasant sort of fellow,” Kathryn said sarcastically. “Janeway to Seven.”

           “Seven here.”

           “We will be receiving a transmission shortly detailing the boundaries of restricted space if you be so kind as to plot a course around it.”

           “Will do, Captain.”

           “Tom take us back five lightyears and hold position until Seven can give us a course.”

           “Understood.”

           “Ensign Kim, I want a damage report on my desk as soon as possible,” Kathryn commanded.

           “I’ll get right on it.”

           “I’ll be in my ready room.”

XxXxX

An hour later the senior officers and Seven were sitting in the briefing room.

           “How long will the repairs take, B’Elanna?” Kathryn asked as she rubbed her face.

           “At least three weeks, probably more, we’re not quite done assessing the damage,” she explained.

           “The warp core?” Kathryn dared to ask.

           “It took some damage,” Tom explained, “But we can reach warp four for now.”

           “B’Elanna make that your priority.”

           “What about crew quarters?” B’Elanna asked.

           “How bad is it?”

           “It’s looking like we will have to triple up rather than simply double up until we can make repairs.”

           “How long?”

           “That is what is going to take the three weeks. It is the main damage we have.”

           “Chakotay, take care of assigning quarters to people. I’ll even take people if my quarters are still intact. Preferably, people from this room.”

           “Will do Captain, I’ll assess the situation as get back to you.”

           “Moving on. Doctor how many causalities do we have?”

           “No one dead, thankfully but we have fifty-two injuries, non-life threatening.”

           “It almost seems that just wanted to make things inconvenient for us rather than permanently damage us.” Kathryn shook her head. “Alright Seven, what does our new course look like?”

           “At warp four it will take us about two months to get around the space. It isn’t particularly large. One we have higher warp capabilities it will shorten the journey significantly at warp eight it will take a little bit less than a month, about the time it would have taken us to just go straight through their territory at the same speed.”

           “Thank you Seven. All of you keep me updates on your progress. Dismissed.”

XxXxX

Kathryn was in her ready room trying to rub the sleep from her eyes when Chakotay walked in.

           “You have news for me I presume.” She straightened up in her chair.

           “Yes, your quarters are intact.”

           “Who are you assigning me with?”

           “You have a choice. Tom and B’Elanna or Seven and I.”

           “I get to choose?”

           “Captain’s privilege.”

           “I’ll take you and Seven.” She paused. “Have the rest of the assignments been figured out?”

           “Yes, I’ll inform everyone once I leave this room.”

           “Good, go to bed afterwards. That’s an order.”

           Chakotay smiled. “Of course Captain.”

XxXxX

Kathryn walked slowly to her quarters that night. She didn’t know if she was still in her right mind. Why she chose to room with Chakotay and Seven when things where still so tense was beyond her. She knew this would probably just make things worse but she couldn’t help wanting to be near them. She wished the ship hadn’t been attacked when it had. She knew now after everything she wasn’t going to get an answer to her question. She could hope she was going to but she knew she wouldn’t. They would either be thinking of other things, like the safety of this ship, which is reasonable, or they would pretend like the question never happened. She sighed. She was tired. She picked up her pace back to her quarters skirting the damaged parts of the ship.


	10. Chapter 10

Chakotay and Seven were sitting in the captain’s quarters, their temporary quarters.  

“We can’t stop now,” Chakotay explained. “How would we explain what happened? Why all of a sudden we no longer are dating. And acting out a break up would be so awkward is this small space.” Chakotay was secretly glad he got the chance to be close to both of them at the same time. It would tell him a lot. He hadn’t forgotten the captain’s question.

Neither had Seven. “Unfortunately, I agree,” she drawled. She was starting to chafe in this fake relationship. She wanted to stop pretending. She wanted to stop walking on eggshells.

Chakotay slightly liked this mild torture he was in. It was nothing he wasn’t used to. His dinners with the captain had helped him gain a tolerance, a taste for that type of torture. It was a familiar type of pain. It was an almost comforting one.

Kathryn walked in. She was slightly disheveled from the fight earlier. Her uniform shirt was partially open. Her hair was loose at her shoulders and her face was a little red. Chakotay looked her up and down and a small smile played on his lips. Before he knew what he was doing he got up and kissed her.

“Wait,” Kathryn said simply as she pushed him away. “Seven, I need your approval before I do anything.”

Seven thought for a moment before saying, “Chakotay can do what he wants.”

“Do you want to join us?” Kathryn asked. “My proposal still stands.”

“I’d like to but,” Seven shook her head. “I can’t.”

“Why?” Kathryn questioned.

Chakotay tried to beg Seven with his eyes not to ruin this.

Seven just shook her head. “I just can’t” She rubbed the top of thighs and got up.

“Why?” Kathryn asked again.

“Because,” she threw her arms up. She stopped and looked at Chakotay. She decided right there she was going to tell the truth. “because Chakotay and I aren’t in a real relationship. He came up with the idea to capture your attention and it worked. Each of us has an understanding with you but not with each other. I resent the fact that I am restricted in this way.”

“You said you were okay with it? And we’ve reassessed more than once. Why didn’t you say anything?” Chakotay spoke up.

“What was I supposed to say? You were always so genuine in your wish to attract the Captain. I couldn’t take that away from you.”

Chakotay was lost for words.

“You put yourself through this kind of pain for me?” Kathryn reached out to Seven but Seven jerked away.

“You haven’t helped the situation,” Chakotay softly said.

Kathryn turned to him. “How do you mean?” She raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms.

“You don’t let anyone in. You keep this thick wall around you and then wonder why people are frustrated with you and become distant.”

“Sometimes I just need time to make up my mind.” Kathryn stepped back.

“It takes you five years to make up your mind? I poured out my heart to you on that planet and you did nothing.”

“I was a different person back then. I was still trying to stick to the ideals Star Fleet put in my head.” Kathryn defended herself.

“We were faced with seventy years out here. Some Star Fleet principals can go fuck themselves.”

“Do you think the same way he does?” Kathryn addressed Seven now.

“I was not, am not an official crew member. You didn’t have the same restrictions when it came to me.”

“I didn’t want to take advantage of you,” Kathryn explained. “You were so fragile at first, your individuality so new. I didn’t want to groom you into something you weren’t so I let you be.”

“I haven’t been that kind of fragile for a while now,” Seven said softly. “You build a lot of walls Kathryn.”

Kathryn’s name on Seven lips sounded like sweet music but Kathryn had to push it away. “So do you Seven. Even if I had attempted to seduce you, would you have responded?”

“That is not the point,” Seven deflected and started pacing.

“Probably not but don’t you think it should be addressed all the same?” Kathryn cocked her head to the side.

“I’m honestly surprised I got you to open up the little bit you did to me on our away mission,” Chakotay added.

“If you hadn’t put me on the spot, asking me about my romantic interests I might have actually told you that you were one of them and then we wouldn’t be in this mess.”

That threw Chakotay off. “Wait what?”

“I am romantically interested in you Chakotay but I was too scared to say anything when you randomly asked me about my romantic interests because I didn’t know what you were looking for or if you would return my interest.”

“So, all of this is my fault?”

“How did you even get to that point but now that you mention it, yet it is. It was your idea that got us in this frustrating situation,” Seven explained.

Chakotay stayed silent.

“You don’t even try to deny it.” Seven pointed out.

Chakotay walked up to Seven. Seven stilled and faced him. “No, I don’t but I am going to try and fix it.”

“By doing what?” Seven’s heart was racing fast.

“This.” Chakotay grabbed her gin and gently pulled her into a kiss. “I’m romantically interested in you too.”

“Can I watch?” Kathryn asked ad she settled herself on the couch knowing what was about to happen. “You’re in my quarters after all.”

Seven looked at Chakotay and then to Kathryn before saying, “You can join.”

Kathryn smiled and got up from the couch. “I’d love to.” She ran her hands over Seven’s hips from behind and pulled Seven close keeping her hand pressed against Seven’s hips.

Chakotay took Kathryn’s hands off of Seven and placed them on his own hips trapping Seven between them. Seven could feel Chakotay’s arousal pressing into her. She was nervous. Holodeck programs are only so real. She had thankfully had the necessary surgery discretely right after this all began. She was glad of her pragmatism.

Kathryn felt like she was flying. She couldn’t have dreamed that this would happen to her. She squeezed Chakotay’s butt pressing them closer together. She nuzzled her head into Seven’s neck and nibbled gently there. Kathryn heard Seven take a sharp breath. Kathryn smiled and continued.   
           Chakotay was finding it hard to breathe, not because he was pressed so close to Seven but because he was almost overwhelmed with desire for the two women before him. It was almost painful. Almost. He pulled Seven’s hair out of her normal style and let it fall to her shoulders. He loved the way it looked. He grabbed a fistful of it because he could before letting go and kissing her hard on the mouth again. He ran a hand up her torso and let it rest on her throat. He ground his hips into Seven and he felt a surprised moan through his hand at her throat. He placed his mouth at her ear. “Strip for us,” he told her.

She somehow removed herself from in between them. Knowing what Chakotay was looking for she slowly took of her one piece, revealing a little bit of bare skin at a time. Chakotay was almost salivating and it took all of Kathryn’s will not to speed up the process. When Seven was done she stood there unashamedly for before walking up Kathryn.

She looked at Chakotay for a moment. “Asist me,” she told him as she reached her hands to Kathryn’s uniform shirt and finished undoing it so she could take it off. Chakotay grabbed the hem of Kathryn’s undershirt to lift it over her head and Seven lowered herself to deal with Kathryn’s pants and boots. Soon the only person who was dressed was Chakotay. The two women turned to him and looked him up and down. He smiled, put up his hand in surrender and quickly stripped off his uniform and underclothes.

“Come,” Kathryn gestured at them and led them to her bed. She settled down in a chair next to the bed. “I want to watch,” she told them.

Chakotay sat down on the bed and pulled Seven into his lap. Seven shook her head and got off of his lap. Chakotay looked at her questioningly.

“Get all the way on the bed,” she told him in response. He did as he was instructed. Seven climbed on the bed after him and straddled him. She grabbed his hands and placed them above his head. “Keep those there,” she commanded. Chakotay smirked and did as he was told. Seven leaned down to kiss him and rubbed his chest. When she broke the kiss, she ran her fingernails down his chest and torso. Chakotay grunted.

Chakotay, disobeying Seven’s direct order, took his hands from above his head and placed them on Seven. He ran them up and down her stomach, sides, and back. He sat up. He placed his mouth on one of her nipples and sucked. Seven let out a deep moan. When he started humming along with sucking, Seven found herself grinding her hips into his cock. Seven’s breath quickened. Pleasure was building as she rubbed her clit against his erection. Chakotay removed his mouth from the one nipple and Seven protested with a small noise. He smiled, silently laughing to himself as he went over to the other nipple and bit it. Seven almost lost herself in that moment. She squeezed his shoulders and dug her nails into them. Chakotay grunted.

He pushed Seven down onto the bed. He settled his head in between her legs. He pulled her close before starting in his task. He licked and sucked until her hands went to his hair to try and pull his head closer to her. He paused then much to her displeasure. He didn’t know why he had paused but he stayed that way for a few minutes before bringing his mouth back into contact with her. He had to hold her hips down to prevent her from grinding them into his face. She soon moaned out an orgasm.

Seven laying there panting. Her first orgasm that involved a real person was better than she had anticipated. It left her legs weak. She didn’t care. She pushed Chakotay back down on the bed. “Didn’t I tell you to stay.” She straddled him again and guided his cock into her. Seven adjusted herself so she could move her hips better.

“Wait,” Kathryn commanded. They had almost forgotten she was there in their desire for each other. She climbed onto the bed and straddled Chakotay’s face, facing towards Seven. “You better do that justice,” she told Chakotay. He responded in the affirmative before she lowered herself down. Seven started moving her hips as Chakotay started moving his tongue.

Seven acted on impulse and grabbed Kathryn and kissed her. Kathryn took control of this kiss allowing Seven to focus on her movements. Chakotay was focusing on Kathryn. If he were to focus on what Seven was doing to him, he would lose himself completely. He wanted to hold out so that Seven could have her way with him and then, hopefully with Kathryn’s consent, he would be able to pleasure her in that way as well.

Seven was soon moaning out serial orgasms. They built off of one another. Kathryn soon followed with a few orgasms of her own. Seven climbed off Chakotay. She was done. She was spent. She laid down on the bed next to him. Kathryn climbed off as well but she wasn’t finished quite yet. Neither was Chakotay. He grabbed Kathryn before she could climb off the bed. He laid her down and shifted so that he was above her. He guided himself into her. Before he even started moving his hips he kissed her. He kissed her lips, her neck, and down her front. As he started trusting his placed his mouth on one of her nipples and gently sucked. Kathryn’s breath hitched in her throat.

When Chakotay switched nipples it wasn’t long before Kathryn was ridding out serial orgasms. Chakotay let her have her fun for as long as he could before coming himself. He moved from above her and pushed her to the middle. The all soon fell asleep like that, in each other’s arms.


	11. Chapter 11

Chakotay was the first to wake up. What had happened last night flooded back to him. He was ashamed of the argument. He was normally better at communicating than that. The results of the argument however, the sex, was amazing. He felt awkward about it now though. He had said all those things, true things, but he wish he had said them better. He couldn’t deal with this now if they were to wake up. So, he got up, got dressed and headed out in search of B’Elanna. He found her in engineering. It looked as if she had stayed up all night.

           “You need food and a break,” he told her when he saw her. “Come on, I have some replicator rations you can use.”

           “But there is still so much to be done,” she protested as he led her away.

           “You have people who can do the work. It will not help us if our Chief Engineer is too tired to work and too hungry to concentrate,” he explained.

           She growled slightly but let him lead her away. “Is the only reason you’re taking me away because I need a break?” She asked after a moment of being in the corridor with him.

           “No,” his face scrunched up in displeasure. He chewed on his tongue to try and find the words to say. “Things may have gotten better and worse at the same time.”

           “Let me use some of those replicator rations you volunteered before you explain. I need the energy to deal with the mess that you put yourself in.” She led him to the temporary quarters her and Tom were sharing with Tuvok.

           “How does Tuvok like living with you and Tom?” Chakotay asked to allow himself time to think about how he was going to explain what happened.

           “I wouldn’t know. I haven’t been here.” She sighed as she sat down on the couch. “Now make me my favorite meal and tell me what happened.

           And so he did. He made sure to leave nothing out, even some of the more explicit details about last night.

           “Wow, looks like you really made a mess of things. Seven and the Captain of course didn’t help.”

           “I don’t even know where to begin now. I had a plan when I was going to talk to them before but now everything is a mess again.”

           “It is quite the mess yes, but it shouldn’t be that hard to fix this time around. From what it sounds like the things that were said last night were all things that needed to be said. Now, that those things are out you can move past them. All three of you have expressed romantic interest in each other. You need to actually properly talk to this time and try to avoid arguing.”

           “You and Tom argue as a form of communication.”

           “Just because it works for us doesn’t mean it will work for you.”

XxXxX

As B’Elanna was giving Chakotay that last bit of advice, Seven was headed to the Doctor to talk to him.

           “Good morning, Seven,” he said as she walked in. “What can I do for you today.”

           “Can we talk?”

           “Of course. What about?” He put down the pad he had been looking at.

           “There had been a lot going on these past few weeks and I need your help.”

           “I’m listening.”

           She explained everything to him. It felt so good to get these thoughts out of her head. She felt lighter and lighter with each sentence. The Doctor was surprised to say the least.

           “That has been quite a few weeks yes.” He got up from his chair. “It seems like you are in quite the situation.”

           “I’m not sure what to do now.”

           “My best advice would be to go and talk to them. Nothing was every gained by silence and I’m surprised you were silent for this long.”

           “What do I say to them?”

           “I suggest you start at the beginning, like you did with me.”

           “What if they decide after all of this that they don’t want anything?”

           “That is a risk you will have to take.” Upon seeing the look on her face, he added, “However, I doubt that will be the case. Trust in yourself, Seven. It will not lead you wrong.”

XxXxX

Kathryn was alone in her bed when she woke up. She had hoped it would be otherwise, but she knew going to sleep that this was the most likely outcome. It was still early. She didn’t need to be on the bridge quite yet. She knew Tuvok didn’t handle sharing quarters well, so she searched for him in his security office. He was there as she assumed, working on a security report.

           “What can I do for you, Captain?” he asked without looking up.

           “What I need is a friend.”

           He looked up at her. “I presume there have been new developments in your relationship with Chakotay and Seven.”

           “You presume correctly.”

           “Tell me about them.”

           And so she did. She told him how it all got out of hand so quickly. How she was scared of what they thought of her now as they had both left before she was even awake.

           “Have you even thought that they might be going through the same thing you are? That they both felt awkward upon waking and so they searched out their own confidants?”

           “I had not,” she admitted.

           “I’ll call them here if you like,” Tuvok suggested, knowing that Kathryn knew what the next piece of advice would be.

           “Can you stay, at least at the start, so that we don’t argue again.”

           “I’ll do even better, I’ll stay and I’ll have them bring their confidants as well. I find that humans are braver when they’re with people they trust.”

XxXxX

A quarter of an hour later, B’Elanna, Chakotay, Seven, and The Doctor had all arrived at Tuvok’s security office.

           “What’s going on?” B’Elanna asked.

           “I have gathered you all here because the Captain, the first officer, and Seven, all need to talk. The rest of us are here to keep the conversation on track and to encourage honesty when needed.” He paused for a moment, hoping one of the three would break the ice. None of them did, so he continued on, “I suggest we start with each of you saying your current thoughts and feelings. As I am the Captain’s confidant, I recommend that she goes first.”

           Kathryn nodded. “I guess I’ll start with meeting Chakotay. He was my mission, nothing more at first. But then when we had to start working together, I found him a trust worthy and competent man. He was charismatic, that’s for sure but he knew what he was doing. I found myself forgetting that he was a former Maquis member. Tensions were still high though and so I couldn’t let all of my barriers down. Though not long after, the crew settled.

           “I was so hopeful in the beginning that we would find a short way home and so I was rigid in my Star Fleet beliefs because we would be home soon anyways. When Chakotay and I were stuck on that planet together, my Star Fleet principles started to change. I had been faced with staying the rest of my life on planet very far from my home. Some things had to start changing.

           “Chakotay, when you told me how you felt. I didn’t know how to react. I was still hoping that we would make it back to the ship and eventually home. I had only half an interest at the moment in any case but I was tempted to make it a full one.

           “As the years went by and my attraction grew, I found my original reasonings less and less persuasive. The one the stuck though, was I didn’t know if I could still keep command over you if I were to be in a relationship with you. My command is everything to me. It is how I base my identity. It was the one thing I couldn’t afford to lose.

           “Our dinners were always a god send. I had found a wonderful friend in you. Chakotay. And at that point, I didn’t want to risk the friendship we had. Relationships can end badly and I didn’t want to lose you. I also didn’t want to lose your respect.

           “When Seven came on board, I felt responsible for her. She was my charge and I was leading her through her individuality. I used the excuse with myself, was that the reason I stayed away was because I didn’t want to influence her in the wrong way, that I didn’t want to groom her into being with me. I knew from the beginning that Seven was too strong for that. The truth was I was just scared. I had fallen in love very quickly with you Seven and I didn’t know what to do with it. I had never really been attracted to women before I saw you.

           “When you two started fake dating, I was jealous. I had wanted both of you for a very long time and then it seem you too were no longer available to me. I know now though, that it was I who wasn’t available to you. I love both of you so much but I was so afraid to let my guard down. I got a patched up ending with my fiancé Mark. I was scared to let myself be open again. I was afraid that maybe you would lose respect for me if I were to initiate. That I was somehow being predatory.” Kathryn fell silent. “I was so relieved when I found out that you two were still available to me that I ended up making things worse.” Kathryn nodded that she was done.

           B’Elanna prodded Chakotay in the back so that he could go next.

           “Kathryn, you captured me so much. It had been so long since I told you how I felt that I was started to get anxious. I wanted to be with you so badly, but I knew you had your walls up and as long as you did, I was going to get nowhere with you. I decided at one point in time to let my feelings for you go into the back of my mind. And I did for a while.

           “But then Seven came on board. I was struck with her. Apparently Seven, you have a charm you don’t realize. I allowed myself to want Seven. I allowed myself be interested in her romantically. That was until it seemed as if she was immune to romantic attraction to anyone on the ship. I then told myself that my interest in her was purely platonic and that I wanted her as a friend.

           “I’m not sure what made me thing of the idea to fake date Seven. All I knew is that if I could use a fantasy to make real something that I was wishing for, I would. It wasn’t just Kathryn I had in my when I came up with the plan, it was also you, Seven. If I could be close to you then maybe I would see if you were interested in me at all. However, in my quest for the Captain I screwed up badly with you. I found I was torn between having a real relationship with you or gaining Kathryn’s attention. I didn’t take in to account that I could be in a relationship with both of you, or else this whole thing might have been avoided. But then again, we might not have ever realized our desire for each other.”

           “Seven, I believe it is your turn,” The Doctor said quietly.

           “I was so new to individuality and being a human adult that I was never sure of what to do when it came to interpersonal relationships. I wasn’t sure how to act when I found these new feelings inside of me. They weren’t logical and so at first I ignored them the best I could. But they just got stronger. I wasn’t aware that a person could be in a relationship with more than one person. I thought I had to choose. But I found that I couldn’t and so I stayed silent. At one point in time I decided that I would use the holodeck to see if I could decide which one I wanted more. I created programs for both Chakotay and Kathryn. They only made things worse. I was spending more time in the holodeck in my fake relationships than I was doing anything else. I eventually stopped and tried to get back to reality.

           “When Chakotay advocated for his plan, I was more than skeptical. I, however, wanted to be close to him and if I could attract the attention of the Captain, all the better. I knew it wasn’t going to end well but I ignored that and carried on. Even when we reassessed more than once, I didn’t say anything. It was a small type of torture to be in that fake relationship but I didn’t want it to stop. I didn’t want the closeness with Chakotay to go away. It was also working. We had definitely captured the Captain’s eye. I wasn’t sure what we could do.”

           “Well,” Kathryn started, “I know what we can do now. We can start fresh. We can have our first date once the holodecks are fixed. I’ll get all the details together.”

           “That sounds like a plan.” Chakotay smiled.

           “I look forward to it,” Seven replied.


End file.
